Came upon this particular poem created by the effort of four geniuses who celebrated their mentor and mother



Sight. Wings. Birth.

By your son, NARC

nick/aar/reub/chris

One wonders how wonders come wondering along,
from nowhere,
She came….and left
our lives forever
Changed.

A Single spark in a dark dark cottage. Bright Burning light.
A Lonely Log on a dusty dry hearth. Dim Dead Night
Come chance be, that distant light, Wisely CHOSE
What more can be told? The Consequence was sold!
Let there be light…..

A Penguin, a bulldog, a… a farm of 8 animals and a girl called “Ah Soh”
entered a dark tunnel, but was led out of it by her, with stunning results.
Also, the creator of the gang.
A gang where we’d spent a few nights under the moonlight yearly.
Making its mark
Ever-present, standing there for us.
And we’re, forever grateful, gratified and galvanized by her.
Oh, we’ll never know how lucky we are.

I shan’t compare thee to a summer’s day
Thou art lovelier and more pleasant
When night falls on the twelfth day
Like a light from the moon
Pierced through the infinite darkness
Paving the way to victory
O lovely traitor
How could one compare thee to a mere
Summer’s day


Wood, paper, colours, time,
Blood.
Erection of ‘e playing stage -
The dawn of our time with thy beacon flame,
Totus mundus agit histrionem
Rocks float, and path incised as players of tis’ world
Attuned, ascended, aged.
The eternal GTTCH mark burns on hearts,
When objet d'art fades.

I might need help

Before i start posting, i would like to seek anyone's attention (if there is someone reading my blog still).

PLEASE DO NOT TELL ANYONE OR POST RELATING STUFFS ANYWHERE. IT IS MY THOUGHTS AND WHAT REALLY HAPPENED TO ME. AND I DON'T WISH PEOPLE TO KNOW. AND PLEASE 'ANONYMOUS', let yourself be identified, i beg you.

Been a long time since i last posted. And i'm here because i'm feeling extremely depressed. 2 weeks ago, i felt something wrong with my body, and i went for a checkup. I knew something was wrong, and i was diagnosed with a relapse of my nephrotic syndrome.

A relapse would mean:
1) Protein leakage
2) Edema (swolling of limbs and other parts of the body)
3) Resume of medication
4) Many more.

I was taken off my medication about 6months ago, when i really enjoyed my life by doing whatever i could without the slightest hint of doubt nor remorsefulness. It was also when i knew i was well, at last, after 3 long years.

But it didn't last long. Upon diagnosis, i was placed on a high dosage of my medicine. Which lead to my immune system being to its lowest. (susceptible to illnesses and infections) It did not spared me on the side effects, which there are alot to mention, the agony, the pain, and the psycological barrier.

To any common reader, there is absolutely no way that you can understand what i've been through. The suffering i had to bear, whilst putting a bright smile infront of everyone else, is extremely unimaginable.

The issue for my post today is, of course, not to lament on my relapse, but something that happened to me that led me depressed and pissed at the same time.

And, i must add that, i believe i am coping well with my problems then.

So, today (02/10/2007).

I was having a sore throat, due to my low immune system during the previous week. And on Saturday, i had a bad flu. Well, actually it was a typical flu, but i must say that my immune system is too weak to fight against it effectively.

So, i went to a GP, and was given 2 days Medical Leave. (01/10 - 02/10)

I messaged my supervisor and my senior ( A ) that i would not be able to work on the following day. ( I must add that, i took a couple of MCs 3 weeks ago to perform all the tests before the diagnosis of my relapse, and 2weeks ago i took my PRECIOUS LEAVE to observe my condition at home, even though i knew that i could take MC [my mdm wanted to force me to, but i rejected] )

So, on monday (01/10), another of my colleague ( B ) SMSed me in the morning, and told me that he had a fever that day, and got 3days MC. And, i knew that for today (02/10), 1 of my colleague ( C ) will be going for course. With 'B' taking MC too, my workplace will be understaffed.

And, true enough, 'A' called me up at about noon time, and asked if i would be coming back tomorrow since there is a shortage in manpower.


I went back to work today, albeit my condition and my illness and my low immune system. IT WAS OUT OF KIND INTENTION FOR MY WORKPLACE NOT TO BE UNDERSTAFFED. 'B' was around too. Concerned of his fever, i took the more tiring role in the office.

So what's the problem? It was until some time later, when i asked my supervisor about 'B', and he said that 'B' was here whole day at work the day before (01/10). It was until i asked 'B' about why was he still around yesterday and today, that he admitted it was all a lie.


A lie that made me come back to work. A lie that my other colleagues knew, yet none told me about it, while having the nerve to say understaffed.

It was despicable. Extremely. I was very lucky for not blowing my top at him /them upon knowing the truth. The consequences of me coming back to work with my kidney problems far outweigh being understaffed. They don't understand the SEVERITY of my condition.

I felt cheated. At the same time, i felt lonely. It was as if the whole station were against me. They don't understand anything, and they just thought i was 'chao-kenging'. I felt alone. Depressed, more like it. I was, initially, angry with myself for being pissed over such a trivial matter. But after all, i'm holding on to so many worries.

I had full support from my mdm and captains. Those that understand and concern.
I thank god for these people who made my life a little better, good enough to peek at sunshine on a dark gloomy hill. I thank my family and friends. Those that accompanied me knowing / not knowing my condition, but their company served a big purpose for me.


Many thoughts came into my mind. Should i complain to my superiors? should i confront that guy 'b'? Should i just keep quiet about it?
And, it was when i thought of the place i will go when i am sad. Only cheehow has been there with me before. It is the swing. So, things are abit better now; now that i sorted out. But the feeling of cheated out of good intention and the psychological barrier i need to overcome from my relapse is too painful.

Yes, it is work, get used to it. Easy to say, but in my present situation, you will never know you will collapse or survive.

While i fight to survive.